Remind Me Not To Make My Weeds Mad

I think it's safe to say that I'm a fan of M. Night Shamalamadingdong. Oh wait. That's not his real name. It's...um...Shyamalan?. I'm too lazy to look it up right now. We call him Shamalamadingdong and I'm sticking to it. Back to my point. I'm a fan. I usually don't like scary movies, but I like his kind of scary. Thoughtful scary. "What if" scary. Reality mixed with just the hint of fantasy/sci-fi, just to see what would happen. So when The Happening came out and got bad reviews, it bummed me out. I loved Signs. I loved Unbreakable (though it took me a couple of times to figure out what was going on). I liked The Sixth Sense, though it scared the poop out of me. And although The Village was a complete rip-off of a young adult book I read with my sixth graders a few years ago called Running Out of Time, it was good too. Not a huge fan of Lady in the Water, but it was alright. Mostly I just dislike Paul Giamatti. But on the whole, I have really liked all of Shamalamadingdong's movies. So I had a hard time understanding how The Happening could be as bad as everyone said. So I put off seeing it for several months. Then this weekend I rented it. Ok, it's not horrible. It has the same smart-scary-what-if'edness that I like about his other movies. But can you say GOREY??? It was cheesy gory. Like arms getting ripped off right in front of your eyes, blood spurting from a head wound with each pulse, bodies bent in all the wrong ways after falling from rooftops. And it showed all of it. It didn't hint towards it. Or pan away at the crucial moments. It was in-your-face gory, and it didn't fit this movie. It might fit in a chainsaw horror flick. But not in an intelligent, thoughtful thriller movie. It was a huge turn off, for sure. I don't need to see that kind of gore. Ever. Blech.

Other than that, though, I would have liked it. Like I said, I like to think about the what-ifs in life, especially when they are based on some kind of real probability or even possibility. And I like both Marky Mark and John Leguizamo. Too bad. The one problem with all of Shamalamadingdong's movies is that for a few days afterward, my mind plays tricks on me. He blurs the line between reality and fantasy so well that I half expect the things that happened in the movie to happen to me. I'm looking at the trees and bushes a bit differently today. Suspiciously. If you saw the movie, you'll know why. And if you did, what were your thoughts?