Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Holy Stinky, Batman!


I can live with cigarette smoke. I don't like to, but I can. It smells horrible, it kills you. Whatever. But what I can't stand is someone who reeks to high heaven of old, stale cigarette smoke. Especially in a professional setting. If you must smoke, can't you smoke outdoors where the smell can dissipate? Must you smoke in your closet so that all your clothes smell like they are wrapped in 10-year old tobacco?

Case in point: Yesterday the cable guy came to my house to fix my satellite box. He brought a trainee with him. Not to be judgemental, but when they first knocked on the door, I thought I was about to be robbed by a couple of Hell's Angels (they were privately contracted, evidently). I asked for ID to make sure they really were my cable guys, and then proceeded to lurch violently backward as they approached with their badges. These guys smelled like they had been locked in a 5x5 room with cigarettes burning like incense. No, it was worse than that. Because it wasn't as fresh as that. It was like they had been bathing in water drained from underwear that had been steeped in ash trays. And then rubbing the ash from the bottom of the ash trays all over their tongues. I seriously almost passed out. It was such an offensive smell that I actually did jump backward from the smell. Why do we allow this in our society? What is it about smoking that makes everyone feel like they have to allow it? If someone smelled that strongly of B.O. around us, would we just act like it was no big deal? Or if they approached us smelling that bad of poop would we just be like, Oh, that's their choice. No. We'd freaking barbecue that guy, or harass him, or let him know right to his face, Hey Dude. You stink! But for some reason, because it's his CHOICE to smoke, we just shrug and think, Oh well.

It turns out that the Hells Angels fixing my satellite box were super nice guys. The kind of guys you'd like for neighbors. Polite and considerate and professional. EXCEPT for the fact that it hurt my nose to get within 3 feet of them. Where do we draw the line? Where do one person's rights trample on another person's rights? It's not the smokERS I am complaining about. Or the cigarettes, or even the smoke itself. It's the stench. I don't want to smell rotting fish, or barf, or crap, or body odor, or moldy cheese, or any other noxious smell. So why would I want to smell nasty stale smoke on someone? Is bathing regularly out of the question? Is washing their clothes too much trouble? I'm not sure what the issues is. I know lots of people manage to smoke without it taking on the reek I'm referring to. IS IT JUST TOO MUCH TO ASK TO NOT SMELL BAD?

9 comments:

Christie said...

Ok, you're going to totally think I'm crazy, but I actually don't mind the smell of cigarette smoke. My grandma smoked, and everything about her reeked of smoke. I didn't know her well and she died when I was pretty young. I guess the smell has always reminded me of my grandma - its like the one memory I have. Does that make sense?

CaraDee said...

Is this yet another hint??

Kristine said...

I couldn't agree with you more! I don't mind people that smoke, I don't care that they smoke - it's the yucky stench! I have asthma so it's always bothered me because it makes my lungs cave in and I can't breathe. Maybe I'm allergic.

Chelsea said...

I'm kind of the opposite - I don't mind the after smell of smoke, but I can't stand it when people are smoking around me. I'm allergic to it and when I was younger I used to get awful asthma attacks whenever I'd be around smoke (mostly at my grandparents' house). I got more used to it on my mission after teaching the umpteenth discussion with smoke blowing directly in my face. LOL

Mindi said...

what's so crazy is that it can smell so different on people--my friend's dad used to smoke and i could NEVER smell it on him, but that's because i think he was very concious of it and took precautions.
your cable guys?? not so much.

when i was a little girl i liked the smell--prob only cuz it was naughty. now i've smelled the cable guy version one too many times for it to hold any allure any more.

paying_my_dues said...

you are right, nothing smells worse than the old stench of cigarette smoke, yuk.

Mia said...

It does and doesn't bother me. I know what you mean about the really stale and concentrated icky smell, but I don't really mind it outside or when it is a faint smell.

Tiburon said...

Siiiiiiiiiick. I hate that. Then they come in your house and leave their nastay smell behind!

Ick!

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