Thursday, June 18, 2009

Summer Braincation

I just thought I'd let you all know (and by "all" I mean the four of you who still occasionally check my blog) that my brain has decided to join the masses of Americans who are away on summer vacation right now. She's tired of sticking around this house doing the same old mundane, thought-free tasks and having to watch my body get to do all the fun stuff like laundry and exercising and chasing kids. So she's taking her leave of me and heading out for her own adventures.

Where to? Cancun.


In Cancun my brain intends to drink piña coladas and lounge on the beach and just think. It's been so long since my brain got to follow a line of thought for longer than 22 seconds that she really looks forward to just fixating and dwelling and stewing on things for a while. (Don't tell my brain that she's likely to experience some unpleasant sensations when sending piña coladas directly to the grey matter. She doesn't know about brain freeze!)




Then my brain is going to read. I know what you're thinking.....booooring! But reading is an activity my brain actually formerly enjoyed. Before children. And before DVR. Over the last four years, my brain has nearly forgotten how to sound out letters, so rare have been the reading opportunities. So my brain is going to find a good library and just read all day to her heart's content. Uh....to her cells' content, I guess. She's leaving the heart here with me, fortunately.




Next my brain intends to try to participate in some intellectual conversation. This is nearly laughable. My brain forgets that she hasn't attempted anything that ambitious in almost half a decade. It will undoubtedly take some practice for my brain to form anything beyond a 2 syllable word. But she's pretty convinced if she goes to a few locales where adults hang out, she might be able to work a few words like "propitious" and "categorically" into the conversation. Can't wait to see how that works out for you, Brain.



I'm almost afraid to tell you what my brain thinks she will do after that. Foreign language skills! Hahaha. As if. Brain, I know Cancun is in Mexico, but don't you know that your Spanish is so rusty that you think "cheese quesadilla" is a great conversation starter? And what are you going to follow that up with? Olé? Sombrero? A mangled version of La Cucaracha? Don't you think you're going to make a fool out of yourself? Let me answer that for you. Sí.


Anyway, I'm sure my brain has a few other diverting activities planned while she's away. She's not letting the whole cat out of the bag (my brain can be secretive sometimes). All I know is that while she's gone, don't plan on anything genius showing up on this blog. My hands are pretty fast typers, even on auto-pilot, but without my brain I'm likely to blog about things like TV shows and ice cream flavors and lipstick. You know, mindless drivel.

So if a few weeks go by and things still haven't improved around here, well I guess it will be safe to assume that my brain got detained at the border trying to pass herself off as a local. I'm sure my brain thinks she will be able to talk her way out of something like that. But without my big mouth? Good luck with that, Brain.

14 comments:

Jen said...

Hahaha Arianne you crack me up! I love your blog. mindless or not I am a reader!!! :)

Kristina P. said...

Have a great brain vacation!

J.J. said...

DON'T GO!!!! I miss your bloggity brain. Of the 27 blogs in my reader you are in my top 3! That's right, I'm not afraid to play favorites...Come back from Mexico soon. :)

J.J. said...

Does anyone else have comment regret? As a guy I sometime wonder if the things I say sound creepy and I don't ever want to be that guy...

Omgirl said...

JJ, never fear. You have said nothing to regret. I have one of those creepy commeters, amd you are not it!

rychelle said...

i hope your brain already has her passport. those things take a long time to process these days.

(i'm not your creepy commenter, am i?!?)
;)

Chadlock said...

Have fun brain in Cancun! Maybe I'll join you!

Shawn said...

I have "dream" vacations. I mean that they are all literally in my dreams.

Oh, the things that I have seen....sigh....

L. said...

Arianne, this may be your funniest blog yet! I love the insertions of your brain in sunglasses, a Mexican hat, and in various locations. Must have taken you some time, but how FUNNY! You are so clever!

Chelsea said...

Haha! Love the brain in the sombrero. :D

André said...

Now we're all wondering if we are the creepy commenter. It would be really weird if it were your mom, though. Espero qu tu cerebro se divierta en Cancún y que se cuide para que todos podamos gozarnos de sus creaciones literarios de nuevo.

MiaKatia said...

This was a great post! So funny. Amazing that you can be so witty even with your brain all the way in Mexico. Enjoy the books and the brain freeze.

SO said...

I wish my body was going to Cancun let alone my brain! Have a great time!

Melissa said...

You had me at Cancun. I need to come with you. My brain can speak enough spanish to get our pina colada's virgin, and chips and guac and that is really all we need right?