One More Reason To Love Oprah

My husdband is an Oprah hata. but I think it has more to do with his x-wife liking her than him actually disliking Oprah. What is there to dislike about Oprah? She's smart, funny, assertive, has a strong sense of self despite her wealth and fame, and she gives away free stuff!!!

Case in point: Oprah is giving away a free photobook at Snapfish.com. The idea is that you can take digital photos of your children's artwork and make a nice hardbound book of them (and that throw all that crap away!!!). Follow this link to read about it and get your free photo book.

Free Photo Book

Thanks Oprah!

(And just so you know when you google yourself and find me talking about you on my blog, Oprah, I would love you even without the free stuff.)

Lost in Translation

Daphne, as most 3 year olds do (at least I hope they do or I am a little worried about her) likes to make references to things that have no relation to anything at hand. Here is an example. Today I was helping her go potty and she said, "Mommy, Sara doesn't like rough toilet paper." Ummm...Ok. Where did that come from? First of all, I had no idea who she was referring to as she has no friends named Sara. She does, however, have two aunts named Sara(h). Second of all, I'm pretty sure neither auntie has ever made any declarations to Daphne on how they like their toilet paper. So I questioned Daphne further. "Daphne, who is Sara?" "Sara. With the puppies," she went on. "Oh, CARA," I clarified. For the record, Cara is my friend. And I'm sure she's never specified her preferences on toilet paper. But at least she does have puppies. That part of the conversation was based in reality. "What are the puppies names?" Daphne went on. "Pearl, Chowder, and Emma," I replied. "Mommy, can I go see Poo and China and Fred?" she asked. Uh....maybe I should get her hearing checked too.

Hopelessly Devoted to You

Dear Readers,

I have done so much for you. First, I started blogging. And isn't your life better for it? Then my blog went public--so much easier to deal with. Then I got rid of that horrid word verification so that you didn't have to lose your mind every time you tried to comment. Next I allowed even anonymous people to comment (though no one has taken me up on that golden opportunity yet. Dang it.) Then two days ago I removed comment moderation altogether. Because I love you all so much. (Did you even notice? Sniff sniff.)

Now I humbly request that all of you get rid of your word verificiation and any music playing on your blog. I'm tired of hitting mute. It's only fair.

Thank you.

-The Management

Santa Baby

Today Daphne asked me, "Mommy, where does Santa live?" And suddenly I realized that my oldest child is getting to the age of asking questions about things that might force me to lie through my teeth for years. I'm about to launch her headlong down the rabbit hole of fantasy and deception and magical happiness beyond all measure. Am I up to the task? Are my fibbing skills sufficiently honed to keep up this charade for a decade or more?

I can honestly say that I have no memory of ever believing in Santa. I'm sure I must have at some point. But I can't remember it. I don't remember finding out he wasn't real either. I just don't remember anything about Santa until I was in my early teens and my mom asked me to help wrap presents. She told me to write "From Santa" on some. This didn't alarm me, so I must have known by then at least. But the event of actually finding out evidently didn't traumatize me enough to even remember it.

So I ask you, what do you tell your kids? The truth or that Santa is real? And when do you stop? When are they old enough to be told there is no Santa? And if they hear it from others, do you give in or keep up the charade? Red pill or blue pill...which is it?

BIG Losers

Today was the happiest day of my life. OK, that's a slight exaggeration. But to say that Brady getting kicked of Biggest Loser tonight was the best part of my day by FAR is not an exaggeration at all. It actually beat out the chocolate cream pie I was eating while watching Biggest Loser. And that's saying something. So that's either a testament to how lame my day was, or a sign of how much I despise and loathe every single person on the blue team...except Amy, MY HERO! I actually screamed, screamed OUT LOUD and pumped my fists in the air like freaking Tiger Woods, I was so happy when she voted Brady off. I hate hate hate Vicky, and I hate hate (one less hate) Heba, and I definitely hated Brady. Now that he's gone, maybe there is a chance of the other blue losers getting kicked off too. So now you see why this was a truly excellent day for me. WooHoo!!!

All-weather or Fair-weather

I want you all to confess: Are there blogs you read just for the sheer joy of reading them, blogs that you comment on even if the author never comments on your blog?

Or you a tit-for-tat blogger only? Will you only visit, read, and comment on blogs if that person does it for you and in equal amounts?

The reason I ask is that I read 4 or 5 blogs that I read just for the joy of them. Some I comment on regularly, some I comment on rarely. But I don't care if the author comments on my blog or even reads my blog. Most of those authors, I am sure, never do and never will. But I keep reading because I like what they have to say.

I have also noticed (and appreciate) people who read my blog even though I don't always, often, or ever comment on their blogs. It's the sincerest form of flattery to me when they keep reading even when I can't keep up on them.

So I just wonder...how many people out there read and enjoy a blog for the writing's sake? Or is blogging a two-way conversation only for you?

Watch Your Butt!

Yesterday my darling husband was reading my blog and clicked the "next blog" button, thinking it would send him to my next blog post. Instead, as you know if you've ever clicked that button yourself, it sent him to some random blog in cyberspace. And the one he landed on was....interesting. Possibly disturbing. Definitely in a language I have no way of deciphering whatsoever (it's Finnish, in case you're wondering). So take a gander. And then come back and answer a few questions for me.

click here
Here's a hint...

So my questions are...

Which disturbs you most-- the fact that a man in Finland is taking pictures of women's behinds without them knowing and posting them on his blog for the whole world to see? Or the fact that so many of their behinds are so awful? Because I think the second one bothered me more. It made me paranoid. Is my behind that ugly? Do I look that dumpy in jeans? It definitely made me think twice about ever buying jeans with really low pockets. Those were the least flattering ones by far.

I think I'm going to sign off now and go do some squats. About a thousand. Just in case I ever go to Finland.