Monday, March 31, 2008

4 Random Facts About my Kids

I got tagged by Tib on this one, and since no one I know with kids doesn't look for an excuse to talk about them, I'm going to jump on this one...

1) Beck is very musical. Although he is only 15 months old, he is very into music. Ever since he was a few months old, he would turn his head whenever he heard music. And since he was able, he would bop his head when it came on. Often even when I didn't notice there was music in the background, I'd look over and see Beck bopping his head. I'll be very surprised if he doesn't turn out to be something that deals with music.

2) Daphne is a movie queen. She has always loved movies. When she was only 9 months old, she would sit and watch an entire movie, end to end, without stirring. Beck isn't like that. And most kids I know aren't like that. But Daphne has always loved her movies. Her day consists of short periods of play or eating followed by and proceeded by her begging me to watch movies.

3) Beck is almost 16 months old and isn't walking yet. He's super mellow and just fine crawling around. I thought for sure he'd beat Daphne to walking (she walked at 14 months), but no. Not interested.

4) Daphne didn't get her first tooth until 16 months old. Beck has almost as many as she has now before the age that she had her first tooth. It's funny how different your kids can be.

If you want to do this blog, consider yourself tagged!

My 5 CD's

Who even buys CD's anymore? But here is a fun little game to play: If you were stranded on a desert island (why is it always a desert island? I want a jungle island with a fresh water source please) with a diskman and unlimited batteries, what 5 CDs would you want? No compilations or "best of" albums allowed.

1. Tori Amos - Under the Pink (Little Earthquakes takes a close 2nd)

2. Bjork - Post. It was hard to narrow her down to 1 album. I like so many!

3. Sarah Mclachlan - Fumbling Towards Ecstacy. SO sing-along-able.

4. The Cure - Wish. Another band that I had a hard time narrowing down. I like almost every album they have ever made. Even the B Sides ones. But Wish has more of my favorite songs than any other album.

5. Indigo Girls - Rites of Passage. There's no group/musician I love to sing along with more than the Indigo Girls. They are amazing. As far as albums, it was hard. There are a lot of songs that I love by them, but no 1 album contains enough of my favorites! I wish I could've done a compilation CD for this choice. Oh well. I also wouldn't have chosen this CD just based on the cover. I know it was the 90's, but what were they thinking???

What about you? Which would be your 5?

Sunday, March 30, 2008

No Time Like the Present

I got two awesome presents this week, not already mentioned in my birthday post:

1) From my brother Ben and his wife Nicki, I got a beautiful box from The Red Envelope. The present inside was wonderful too, but the box was seriously impressive. Inside were some hand made cast iron bells. Wind chimes. I have them hanging in the tree just off my deck right now. But I'd like to hang them just outside my kitchen window so I can listen to them in the spring and summer. I just need to find something to attach them to. In the meantime, when this horrid new snow melts, I'll listen to them tinkling in the tree.

2) From my wonderful, thoughtful husband, I got an unexpected bouquet of purple tulips. He knew that I had a bad day the other day, and so he brought me home some flowers to cheer me up. And they did. He is the kind of guy who will go out of his way to help someone if he knows they need it. I dont' generally complain to him. But I did let slip this time how discouraged I was feeling, and he made sure to help me feel better. He also called me in the middle of the day on Friday to see if he could bring me some lunch. What a sweetheart.

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Back to Life, Back to Reality

I'm finally getting around to writing about my trip. Don't worry, my woe-is-me psychosis from the other day is gone. That's the nice thing about my bad days...they're few and far between, and they're very short lived. Some people like to wallow in their misery. I'm not one of them. I like to scarf my self-pity down like a decadent dessert, savoring it for a few minutes, then being done with it. I don't keep eating it day after day--it'll just make you sick.

So, the trip. We rushed through Easter morning and packed up. We hit the road about 12:30. It was a fun drive. Talking, reading to each other, feeling the weather get warmer each time we stopped for food or gas. We got to Vegas about 5:30 and checked in. Our hotel, the Signature Suites at the MGM, was absolutely beautiful. The Signature Suites is a non-smoking, non-casino hotel just behind the MGM Grand. So you're right off the strip, close to the action, but away from the noise and smoke. The Suite is like a mini condo with a kitchen, huge spa tub, lounge area and a giant king pillow-top bed. It's one of the few times I've slept in a hotel bed that was really comfy.

That night we went to eat at an Italian Restaurant at Treasure Island. I ate WAY too much and was uncomfortably full. But it was delicious. Then we wet to see Mystere, the Cirque de Soleil show (watch the trailer in that link). All I can say about that was, WOW. The first 15 minutes were actually more strange than anything else--weird costumes and some odd slapstick stuff inbetween the set changes. But then they started doing the really amazing acrobatics and it just blew my mind. We were in the 3rd row, right off the stage, so it gave us a really cool perspective. We could see the actors' faces and expressions so clearly. But a lot of the stuff was going on up above us on trapeezes, bungee swings, etc. So ideally a seat farther back probably would have been better. But it was still amazing. I don't know where they get these amazing athletes from. Actually, that's not true. I bet they get them from China and Russia after those gymnasts have kicked our butts at the Olympics. And of course there were a few skimpy costumes and some a little homo-erotica thrown in. It was Vegas after all.
This is an example of the homo-erotica. These guys were amazingly strong and did some unbelievable stunts. but they also lingered near each others butts and crotches a little too long for my taste. The little girl sitting behind us kept giggling nervously. So did Kelly.

The next day we got up and had breakfast in the little cafe in our hotel. It was super delicious. I had raspberry lemon pancakes with vanilla bean whipped cream and maple syrup. Kelly had the American breakfast, all of which was cooked divinely. And it was included in our stay! After breakfast, Kelly went golfing at Rhodes Ranch and I went to the spa for my very first pedicure. The spa was amazing. I wish I'd had $1000 and the whole day to spend there pampering myself. But the pedicure was all I could afford. It was nice. The lady who did it was a bit chatty, but she did a good job (I guess. I have nothing to compare it to.) She tried to convince me to get hot pink nail polish, and I had a hard time convincing her that hot pink wasn't really my thing. In the end, I ended up with a nice coppery color and very greasy legs from the massage oil she rubbed on me.

Kelly's golf took way longer than my massage, so I went and checked us out of the hotel, stowed our luggage with the bellman, and headed out to the pool. I spent the next couple of hours checking my email, reading, lounging by the pool, and having a delicious quiche with salad and a piece of New York style cheesecake. I can't think of a better way to spend the afternoon. It was utterly relaxing, about 80 degrees, and I did nothing to hurry or stress myself out. Plus< the cheesecake was the best I've had since I worked at Kathy's Cheesecakes my senior year of high school.

When Kelly came back from golfing, we both changed and went to dinner at a Hawaiian fusion restaurant called Roy's just off the strip. My cousin Erik took me there a few trips ago to Vegas. It is one of the best restaurants I've ever eaten at. If you're ever in Vegas, skip the buffets and go to Roy's. The food is divine and reasonably priced. Again, I stuffed my face until I thought I would explode. And then I ate a little more. Knowing you can't take it home and eat the rest tomorrow makes you feel like you have to eat it all. Not a good idea.

We stopped by to visit my cousin Erik and his wife Marianne and their kids and new baby on our way out of town. And then we headed to St.George. We got there late and pretty much collapsed in Kelly's friend's condo that we were renting. The next day we got up and snuck into the club house to work out (the guy who owns the condo hadn't paid his dues, oops.) Next we had brunch with my BFF Jeanette (who just moved to St.George) at The Cracker Barrel. Boy, those Southerners know how to do a big, greasy breakfast! Fortunately, Kelly made me stop half way through so I wouldn't eat too much again. Being on a diet has definitely shrunk my stomach. But not my eyes.

Then we golfed at The Ledges, a beautiuful golf course. It starts off pretty flat and broad and ends up with some amazing canyon views, rolling greens, and big drops off the fairway edges. I'm happy to say that I started off the first hole with a BIRDIE! I think that makes 3 birdies for me in my life. I was very stoked. I played very well on the front 9 and the guys we played with applauded every time I made a good shot. I felt like Tiger Woods with a televised audience, hehe. But then I completely fell apart on the back 9 and by the end I was in a completely foul mood. And the guys were no longer applauding. That's golf for you.

Well, the rest of the trip was eating, sleeping, and driving home. It was really excellent to spend some time alone with Kelly. It was nice to sleep as late as we wanted (which was usually not later than 8:30 thanks to waking up at the same time with the kids every day at home). And it was nice to not have any responsibilities for a few days. Everyone needs to take a vacation like this once in a while just to remember who they are and what they love about their spouse, which for me is a lot. I have him to thank for that whole trip and for making it so awesome. Thanks, Kel.

My Celebrity Soul Mate

I wasn't sure this was true (and I was honestly hoping George Clooney would come up) so I took the quiz twice. I got the same result both times. So I guess my celebrity soul mate (as determined by a whopping 7 questions) is...

Take the Quiz

Friday, March 28, 2008

Not a Funny Post

I should be blogging about how great my vacation to Vegas and St.George was. I should be trying to be witty and original. But you know what? I'm not in the mood. I had a crappy day. And that's all I feel like blogging about. If you don't want to hear it, come back in a few days for the funny, witty, original posts. Otherwise, grab a chair and polish up your "poor you" comments.

I can't even chalk it up to any one thing (except maybe a hormonal cliff dive). Today was just everything that is frustrating about my life packed into one day.

1) Beck is sick. Or something. I'm not sure. He has been snotty for 27 of the last 30 days. I have gone through nearly 2 super-sized bottles of Dimetap. He is teething. 6 teeth in 6 weeks. I have gone through 2 bottles of liquid Advil and a bottle of liquid Tylenol. He is probably constipated. He's had issues with that lately. He might have an ear-infection due to his cold, but there is no way to tell. The last 2 times I've spent $30 to take him to the doctor for an ear infection, he hasn't had one. He's clingy, whiney, and won't let me stray more than 2 feet from him w/o bursting into tears. And sometimes even 2 feet is too far and he wants to be in my lap or in my arms ONLY.

2) Daphne is needy. She needs attention or some kind of food, movie, toy, book, or listening ear about every 3 minutes. I love her madly, but just when I think I have Beck settled, Daphne needs something. She is cheerful most of the time, just demanding.

3) Coming back from a vacation almost isn't worth going. There is so much laundry to do, house to clean, child to deal with. I have no food in the house. I have no idea what to cook for dinner. I have no diapers. I need to go shopping, but I don't dare with two snotty, crabby, needy kids.

4) It was freezing cold and super windy today. The garbage bin out on the curb blew over twice, sending diapers, pizza boxes, papers, and yard waste flying all over the neighbors' lawns and down the street. I picked it all up. Twice.

5) It was a bad hair day. I really needed to color my hair. So I did. But you know how you're not supposed to shampoo your hair for 24 hours after you dye it. So I didn't want to go through the trouble of blow drying and straightening it (which takes over an hour) knowing that I'll have to wash it again tomorrow. So I just had fuzzy, frizzy, ugly hair today. (Although the color was at least even.)

6) I gained 3 lbs in Vegas. Weigh-in is tomorrow. I've been yo-yo'ing with the same 3 lbs for 6 weeks. It sucks.

7) My husband came home from work at 8:30pm. That probably added to my frustration. It's not his fault. He works his butt off to provide for our family, bless his heart. It just makes a long day longer sometimes.

8) While we were out of town, our plumbing had issues. The shower plugged up and spilled over onto the floor. My mother washed our floor mats for us, but they were dry clean only. So now they're in shreds. Throwing them away doesn't bother me terribly--having floor mats that are dry clean only is idiotic. They've been a pain since Day 1. But they have shed red threads all over every carpet within 30 feet of the bathroom. And after you read #10, you'll know that those threads are still there and probably will be for days. That bothers me.

9) One of my home party customers left me a voice mail telling me how horrible she thought my customer service was, how she'll never come to another one of my parties again. Why? Because I offered her some products at my cost after she didnt' like the one she'd ordered. It was just out of courtesy that I did this. But between my two trips out of town this month and the stomach flu in between, I have't gotten them mailed yet. It shouldn't bother me, but it does. Partly because I feel like she's spitting in my face after I went out of my way to be nice. And partly because I know she's right. Which leads me to #10...

10) I know this is just part of life when you have two little kids--my situation is by no means unique--but it bugs the living crap out of me that I spent my whole life becoming who I am; becoming efficient, tidy, orgainized, well-read, fairly fashionable, educated, a good cook, a good friend, a good worker; But that all that has become submerged beneath the alternate reality of just being a mom. I love love love my kids. I love love love that I can be a stay at home mom and provide the stability and affection and guidance that they need. But some days the messes, the whining, the snot and poop, the lack of time, the lack of freedom, the lack of appreciation, the lack of space, the lack of quiet, the lack of sleep, the lack of down-time, the overall lack of myself is depressing. There is no "me" anymore. There is only this replica of me called "Mommy." She can't figure out what to make for dinner and can't get things shipped on time and can't keep the house even close to clean enough and can't remember to return phone calls, and is too tired to look good, and too thrifty to dress nicely, and too busy to have friends, and her hair is getting gray and her boobs have lost their perk and her car is always messy, and she's late when she wants to be on time, and she doesn't read anymore or play the piano anymore or learn new languages anymore or travel(much) anymore, or do all the things her former self was proud of. She just muddles through each day, trying to get a bit of everything done and keep the kids alive.

I know, boo hoo hoo. Like I said, it's nothing novel. It's the same old sob story mothers have been crying since babies were invented. Or maybe since cars and TV were invented and mothers got the idea that they might be able to do go somewhere or do something besides sit and hold kids all day. But today it just piled up and overwhelmed me. I would eat some chocolate to cheer myself up, but like I said, tomorrow is weigh-in. So instead it's 1:34am and I'm blogging about it. It's 2nd best to chocolate. And fat-free. Aren't you glad you just got such a nice big helping?

p.s. Don't feel obligated to comment with sympathy. You've been there too. I'm not looking for recognition as a martyr. I just needed to get this off my chest and my husband is asleep.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

The Beginning of the End

So today is the beginning of the end of my life. When you turn 34, you are no longer in your early thirties. You are in your mid-thirties, no getting around it. After that is your late thirties. And then your forties, where all you can do is dread your fifties. After that, you might as well be dead. So basically, I just put one foot in the grave today. I can no longer pretend that I'm young.

On a good note, I did have a nice birthday. Mostly because today was preceeded by 3 days in Las Vegas and St.George WITHOUT the kids. I'll post a blog or six about that trip tomorrow. But for today, I'm just going to stick to the birthday stuff.

Today started on the right foot when I got to wake up when I wanted to, not when the kids woke me up. Granted, I woke up like a clock when my kids usually wake up anyway, even though they weren't there, but at least I could lay in bed for a few more minutes. Then I got to spend a few hours in the car with Big Daddy, reading and talking in peace. It was wonderful to see the kids again when I got home. I have to admit, I did miss them.

Other than that, I got few nice presents (see pictures below), Big Daddy brought home a pizza for dinner so I didn't have to cook, and we went out for dessert with the kids. I didn't actually get to blow out a candle, but Daphne sang Happy Birthday to me. Well, that's not exactly true. She sang Happy Birthday to Josh, her little friend who had a birthday party a couple of months ago. Ever since, every birthday song is sung to Josh. Oh well, close enough.

Here is what my sister got me for my birthday:
It's a necklace with two little green peas in a silver "pod" and it says "two peas in a pod."


From my husband (aside from the trip to Vegas/St.George). It's my new favorite fragrance. The container is a bit 13-year-old, but the scent is crisp and fresh.

And I decided to start a new tradition and buy myself a new pair of shoes on my birthday. Here is what I bought this year...
They're more beige in real life and not so white. Very comfy.

Well that was it. Anyway, I'm old but I got some nice loot. And I got to spend it with my wonderful hubby and wonderful kids. Life is good.

Friday, March 21, 2008

True Love - Custom comment codes for MySpace, Hi5, Friendster and more

So I was doing my morning check of my iGoogle stuff (I say it like it's a daily ritual, but if you read my blog you'll know that's a lie. I just set it up yesterday.), which is never a good idea to do while your kids (kid, actually--the other one is still sleeping like a good child should at 8:30am) are awake. I could hear him playing with glass pebbles on the bathroom floor, dumping them from one decorative bronze cup to another--a little activity I set up for my kids at this age so they will leave me alone while I'm online. But then I got distracted with reading a funny new blog I found (Every Day I Write the Book) and suddenly realized that I couldn't hear the tink-tink of glass pebbles anymore. Never a good sign. I listened and could faintly hear a swishing sound and knew just what it meant: Beck was in The Crapper (the term my husband affectionately made up for the little toilet room off our main bathroom). I went in there ready to discipline him for playing in the toilet but was stopped dead in my tracks by the 3 inch snot bungee jumper hanging from his nose-lip-chin. EW! Hard to get all mad while staring at that! But once I got it wiped up, then I noticed that not only was Beck playing in the toilet water, he'd gotten inventive: This time he was using the bronze cup to empty the toilet water onto the floor! So smart. So I tried to discipline him, but I know this kid is not like my first born--he doesn't care if I get mad. At least, it doesn't deter him. As I was scrubbing his arms down with lye (just kidding, it was espresso scented foaming soap) and contemplating a more permanant solution to keeping him out of the toilet, I noticed an awful stench coming from his general direction. So I went to change his diaper, and it was a poopsplosion. All over the inside of his pajamas and down his legs. (I would worry about grossing my readers out, but I know that 99% of my readers are women with kids, so this is nothing new to you.) I stripped him down, threw him in the shower (where he is probably freezing by now because he's still in there as I write this) and threw his clothes away. (If you'll read the blog posted above, entry "Parental Advice" you'll see that I'm a quick learner). So my point to all this? I cleaned up a huge snot, toilet arms, and poop all within a 60 second period of time. Now THAT, my friends, is true love.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Gaga for Google

First let me say that I hate eating the last of something without noticing it. The last M&M in the bag, the last cookie, the last olive, etc. If I get distracted while eating and then reach for another whatever only to discover that I ate the last one while I wasn't paying attention, I get really bummed. I just did that with my swiss cheese and low-fat Wheat Thins snack. I was eating them as I was browsing online--mindlessly popping them into my mouth. I guess I lost track of how many were left because I just turned to eat the last one and it was already gone! And I'm not about to eat a whole nother slice just to finish off the taste of it in my mouth. It's 3 points! Boo hoo.

Actually, my post today is about Google Reader and iGoogle. I have this friend Tiburon. She's pretty much my connection to everything hip on the internet. Yesterday she introduced me to two awesome new internet thingies (I am very precise in my use of internet technology terms):

1) Google Reader. It's a web-thingy that allows you to keep track of all the blogs you follow. You enter in the blog address and it adds it to a list. Then whenever someone posts, it updates your list. That way you don't have to click back and forth between your own blog and every blog on your list only to find out that no one has posted in days. It is awesome and very time-save-ey. (That is also a technical term you should learn if you are hip.) It only works with public blogs, though. If the blog is private, it won't tell you when it has been updated.

2) iGoogle. Once you have your google reader set up (and you should do that first), then you can set up the most fantastic thing on the internet since the internet: iGoogle. It's a web-page-thingy where you can customize it to show you everything on the ineternet you like to check, read, get informed about, etc., all at a glance. It's like a virtual desktop of everything you need access to online. For example, mine shows me the date and time, the local weather forcast, my gmail account, my Google Reader, my to-do list, today's mortgage interest rate, the Wikipedia search engine, what movies are playing at my local theater, baby sign language words, pictures of places to go before I die, and funny cat pictures (these last two are changed each time I open iGoogle). So at a glance, without leaving that one webpage, I can see all that stuff that I might have to click on 10 different web pages to see normally. It's awesome! You can customize the "gadgets" (what they call each section of the page) by choosing from hundreds of pre-made ones, or you can create your own gadgets. You can even choose a design theme for the header of your page. Here is what one looks like:

I know that is really too small to see much detail. So you can either google images of iGoogle to see some examples, or better yet, just go to iGoogle and get set up! It's super easy, and it will make your life so much easier. Plus, you can use it as a way to make yourself feel more superior to everyone else who isn't hip enough to use iGoogle. See? It's win-win!

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Bragging Rights

I don't have much to brag about. I don't have any sports trophies. I can't run a long ways. I got a crappy score on my SAT, I've never one any pie eating contests (not for lack of trying. On my own. At home.), and my toes are normal length (although 2 are semi-webbed on each foot). But I have traveled a lot. It's probably my one claim to fame. So to add to my U.S. map a post or two ago...

This one isn't quite as impressive as the U.S. one. It says I've visited one big red blob and a few smaller red blobs. I think they need to add the country borders.

And here is the grand finale. Notice my wide traversing of the African continent. Oh well. Gotta leave something for later. (Don't forget to notice Fiji. The little red dot on the right side.) Also, the China one was kind of a cheat. I was in Hong Kong when it was NOT part of China, but now it is. So my Asia map looks a lot cooler than it should.

create your own visited country map
or check our Barcelona travel guide

Monday, March 17, 2008

Where have you been?

How you like THEM apples?

create your own personalized map of the USA
or check out ourCalifornia travel guide

THANKS, TIB! That was cool to see in black and and white.

Star Wars according to a 3 year old

I probably won't have time to post my usual hysterically funny or wise and insightful posts today (sarcasm, in case you weren't sure), so I'm going to post a link to a funny youtube clip:

Other than that, here's what I have to say:

1)Tib, I hope you don't need surgery
2)My kids have colds or something. They're crabby and slightly snotty.
3) My poor Baby Beck has had a tooth/teeth coming in at all times for at least a month. He got the one next to his top front teeth, then his two top molars, which are almost in, then today his bottom two molars broke through, and I can see the tip of his other top second from the middle tooth about to break through. That poor kid!
4) Happy St.Patty's Day!
5) My husband is having a really good sales month at work. Go Big Daddy!
6) I feel gyped. I got a "peanut butter brownie" from Mrs. Fields on Saturday (half of which I'm eating today) and it is NOT a brownie. It is chocolate icing, a peanut butter layer, and the bottom is choclatey/nutty/toffee crumbles. Where is my freaking brownie???
7) I'm down 2 lbs from last Thursday (despite the peanut butter "brownie.") How? I don't know. But I'm still up 1 lb from last week's weigh in. Weigh is such a strange, myseterious thing.
8) I have SO many pregnant friends right now. Congratulations to all of you! And I'm SOOOO glad it's not me.
9) I'm obsessed with the Dog Whisperer (Cesar Milan). I read his book Cesar's Way in Texas and watched the show non-stop when I had the National Geographic Channel for free for two weeks. I don't even have a dog. But I love his ideas so much that I want to get a dog just so I can try all that stuff out! if you have a dog, I HIGHLY suggest you watch that show or read the book. The show is more impressive (to see it in action) but the book gives you lots of details on HOW to.
10) Thank goodness it's spring. I was just about to lose it when it snowed yesterday, but it's nice and sunny and almost bordering on warm today.
10 1/2) Just in case any of you need warning to buy me a present, my birthday is next Wednesday, the 26th. I'll be 29. Again.

Saturday, March 15, 2008

How Clean is Your Bum?

I can tell you, mine is clean as a whistle! Thanks to our new bidet. When we went to Texas, my sister's house had these bidets on all the toilets from the previous owner. At first I wasnt' sure about using them. I stood to the side and turned one on and it shot water across the room about 4 feet. That seemed a little strong to shoot at my bum. But then Kelly kept coming out of the bathroom exclaiming "What a fresh start!" until I just had to try it. And guess what? It WAS a fresh start! It was a little startling at first when it hit you, but then afterward you felt so clean and refreshed. So when we got home, Kelly ordered one for us. He put it in today and I've already tried it twice. (I know, it's more than you ever wanted to know about my bathroom habits. Sorry). I think our water must be colder because I always have to let out a cold "Wooo!" when it hits me, but I still have to say that it really is so much better than just dry toilet paper. Still not convinced? You'll have to come over and try it. I swear, you'll never look at your Charmin the same again.

Friday, March 14, 2008

Dream a Little Dream

So when I was at Sea World the other day, it reminded me of one of my childhood dream jobs: Dolphin person. I don't mean I wanted to be a half dolphin, half human. I mean, I wanted to do sometihng with dolphins. Train them? Study them? I'm not sure. Just something where I would get to interact with them on a daily basis. But not at sea. Open water scares me. Just in a nice, safe tank.

I know what you're thinking: Oh, she's one of THOSE people. But no, I don't have florescent posters of dolphins with tears in the corners of their eyes beneath sparkling waves, amid swirling colors, on my wall. And I don't have a dolphin amulet around my neck. I don't even have any porcelain figurines or stuffed animal dolphins. I'm not a freaky dolphin fan. I've just always felt this connection to them that I can't explain.

Other than that, I've had a few dream jobs that have slipped through my fingers. My DREAM dream job would be to be a photojournalist/writer for National Geographic. I seriously should have gone after that one. I've always wanted to be on Broadway or the silver screen. Who hasn't? I got addicted to acting when I starred in my first play in 2nd grade (something about a princess and a monkey and a necklace). Since then, hardly a day goes by that I don't wish I were acting. Acting, dancing and singing combined, preferrably. Not a practical career with kids, though. And being a primatologist also interests me. I guess all kind of behavior fields interest me, be it human, dolphin, or monkey. Maybe I'll try that one when my kids get older. And the last one? Secretary. You heard me. I know it seems strange, but doing repetative, organizational tasks is super fun for me. I love filing, copying, answering phones, typing, and otherwise creating order out of chaos, especially when I don't have to be in charge, but just follow instructions. But I don't want to be a secretary at like Bill's Muffler and Copy Shop. I want it to matter. So I think it would be really fun to be an ass-kicking secretary for some high-powered business person. I know, I've got thrill issues.

What are your dream jobs?

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Math Time

2 adults + 2 children x 7 days of vacation in Texas = a freaking butt load of laundry. (I'm almost done. I spent most of the day doing laundry and am just now getting time to blog.)

2 children + 2 adults - 1 adult who took a different flight + 3 suitcases + 1 stroller + 1 car seat + 1 backpack + 1 large belt buckle + 1 tiny bottle of eye drops that had to be dug from the depths of my purse = a seriously stressful time going through airport security.

6 cousins + 2 of my kids + 1 aunt and 1 uncle + us + 1 spazy King Charles Cavalier Spaniel = a ton of people (and 1 animal) in one house, albeit a nice big house. Then add a small 8 in the upper right hand corner of the previous answer(i.e. to the power of 8). That equals the decible level at all times in that house.

2 twin beds + 1 husband and 1 wife + a baby sleeping in the room - a lock on the door = no hanky panky on vacation. :(

Hold on, this one is a story problem: Imagine there is a mini van full of 4 kids--ages 2 1/2 to 12 years old--and 3 adults traveling at a speed of 75 miles per hour heading from Austin to San Antonio Sea World. Then for the last 8 miles, the mini van is reduced to a speed of -1 miles per hour because the retarded Texas road repair administration decided to close the freeway altogether and put all those people on a frontage road so it could do approximately 2 yards of road construction. If the last 8 mile leg of the trip takes 1 1/2 hours to complete, how many of the people in the car will have started screaming or swearing by the time they reach Sea World? (If you answered 7, you are correct).

2 womeon on Weight Watchers x all the math problems listed above + a bag of Peanut Butter M&M's and a batch of homemade sugar cookies and a trip to the most amazing bakery you've ever seen + way too many Mountain Dews - 1 trip to the gym and a couple of walks with the dog = a lot more (delicious) consumption of calories than intended.

2 toddlers who are best friend cousins who moved away from each other 4 months ago x 7 days together = so many cute pictures and happy moments for their mommies to watch.

Story problem: 2 adults + 2 children, 1 of whom has a reserved seat and 1 of whom is a lap child, board a plane. The plane has rows of 4 seats, two seats on either side of the aisle. On row 16, 3 of the seats are occupied by the family in question, 1 of them is occupied by a random guy. If the adult with the child on her lap arranges with the random guy sitting next to her for him to move up to a vacant seat a few rows up so her baby can sit in his own seat and not drive her crazy squirming for 3 hours, how many of the 2 adults and 2 children will get to sit in their own seat during the flght? (If you answered 4, you are wrong. Because just before the flight takes off, two fat people sitting in the row in front of the adult and ticketed child complain to the stewardess about how they can't fit next to each other and the stewardess gives the empty seat next to the lap child away to the fat man. So the answer is 3. Boy, you better go back to math class.)

And finally, one more story problem: The Thompsons spent 7 days in Texas. On the first day, the temperature was 65 degrees and sunny. On the second day the temperature was 83 degrees and sunny. On the third day, the temperature was 70 degees and sunny. On the fourth day, the temperature was 55 degrees and overcast. On the 5th day the temperature was 35 degrees with freezing rain. On the 6th day, the temperature was 45 degrees and cloudy. On the 7th day, the temperature was 55 degrees and partly sunny. What was the average temperature in Austin? (If you answered "A hell of a lot warmer than in Utah" you are correct.)

So to sum up this math lesson, Texas had erratic weather, most of which was way better than what we left in Utah, both the flight down and the flight back were hectic with 2 little kids and all our crap. But the kids were actually really well behaved on both flights. I ate a lot of food I shouldn't have on my trip, but I exercised a little bit at least. There were a ton of people in that house, but the kids had an absolute blast and it was so awesome to see my sister and brother in law again. Kelly only got to play 18 holes, which pretty much counts as a wasted vacation for him. But for me it was nice just having him around. And I look forward to going to visit Texas again when the weather is nicer and when I can afford a nanny to sit in coach with my kids while eat filet mignon in first class.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Shout Out to Tib

So my friend Tib is celebrating her 500th post by doing a giveaway of her favorite things. I'm craving some peanut butter candies, so I think I'll enter. And I get a SECOND entry if I do a shout out, so here it is Tib:


Pretty exciting, huh? YOu can check out the magnificence that is Tiburon by clicking on this Here it is.......

Tib's blog

I'll be coming up on my 500th post right about the time most of you taping on your Depends and downing Centrum Silver like it's candy. For my giveaway, I'll be handing out 2-pack shower caps, charcoal foot in-soles, Gift Cerificates to Chuck-a-Rama, free bifocals, porcelain figurines, and Fixident and Benefiber. You can start signing up now by commenting on this post.

p.s. I'm almost done wading through my vacation laundry and will be allowed (by my guilty conscience) to upload Texas pictures tomorrow. So if you've been DYING to read about how it went in Texas, like everyone else on earth, your wait is almost over. I will put you out of your misery tomorrow.

Friday, March 7, 2008

Om Girl

Many people have asked me over the years what my often-used user name, Omgirl, means, most recently my friend Cara. Let me explain...

When I went to college, I thought I wanted to study psychology. I did that for 2 1/2 years and then realized that although I enjoyed psychology, I did not enjoy school enough to take 6 more years of it in order obtain a usable degree in it. So I hunted around for something else to take. Something more useful. Anthropology! You know, that well-paid, pervasive occupation that is always looking for more employees. It's worked out really well, as you can see. Background: Ever since I was a little girl, I have always been fascinated by other cultures, other people. Indiana Jones was me hero. All my friends growing up in Detroit were Japanese, Jewish, Black, Arabic, Chaldean, Indian, and Korean. Ok, there were a few white people. But I always found people of other cultures more interesting. I loved learning other languages, wearing foreign costumes, collecting international knick-knacks (and still have a great collection). So when I found out there was a major in college that basically allowed you to spend all your time learning about other cultures, I knew that was it. So I switched to a double major of Psych-Anthro and signed up for classes (I scrapped Psych altogether a semester later). I also heard that there was an internship through anthropology where you could go to India for a semester. That had been one of my fondest dreams since I met my first Indian friend in elementary school and since 75% of my friends my freshman year of high school had been Indian. So I signed up immediately. During my first semester in Anthropology, I took mostly India-oriented classes in preparation for my trip. And the culture fascinated me. One thing that I read about in my studies was the Om symbol. Most of you probably know the Om from seeing it in classic meditation in movies and such. Sitting cross-legged, hands on knees, eyes closed chanting "Oooooooooooommmmmmmmmm." Yep, that's the one. In Hindu mythology, the Om sound has lots of really cool meanings:

1) Om is all the sounds of the universe put together--heaven, hell, earth and silence.
2) Om is the sound of the past, present, future and the sound of God.
3) Om represents a oneness of body and soul, a oneness with God, a meeting of the spiritual and physical self.
4) When Om is chanted, it resonates with the universe and allows a deeper understanding of the things that are being meditated on.

I liked the ideas behind the Om symbol so well that I got it tattooed on my lower back! So now, I am the Omgirl. There, Cara, was that a long, drawn-out, boring enough response to a simple question for you?

p.s. India was awesome. If you ever get a chance to go...well....nevermind. India isn't for everyone. Let me tell you the story of the mysterious monkey poo first. Then if you still want to go, I can give you some good travel recommendations.

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Deep In the Heart of Texas

So I made it! Fortunately by yesterday afternoon most of my strength was back and I was feeling nearly back to normal. I feel so blessed that I got sick the day before I left, not the day of, and that my husband was home to help instead of it being a week day. Also, my wonderful mother came by to help me get packed and watch the kids, which saved my life. And I managed to get everything done and get out the door only half an hour later than expected (oops). We still made it to the airport on time. And thanks to a friend of Kelly's at work, we found out that he could get a special pass to go through security with me and accompany me all the way to the gate! That was a complete and total miracle. So I didn't have to try to manage all those kids, strollers, car seats, and bags, plus shoes and belts and liquids in my purse, etc. all by myself at the security check point. And when we got to the gate, our flight was about 15 minutes late, so I had time to go get some food for the kids (I had forgotten that our flight was right at dinner time). Really things couldn't have worked out better and I feel like God's hand was really watching over me yesterday. (His hand? Hmmm...maybe his eyes? Actually, I'm not sure how that all works. Let's just say God was with me.)

So that part went well. The flight, however, was much more challenging. When I got on the plane, a flight attendant helped me carry Beck and the car seat while I held Daphne and the backpack. But she told me I had to put Daphne in the car seat because she was the ticketed passenger and Beck was the lap child. I had hoped to keep Beck in the car seat so he'd be more contained. Oh well. So I strapped Daphne in, and we proceeded to wait another 25 minutes for our plane to get put back in the departure queue. Beck was NOT happy about staying on my lap. He wanted to get up and go. I was trying to feed the kids some of the food I bought, but they weren't interested in the turkey sandwich or the fruit. They just got their hands sticky and threw the $8 fruit on the floor. But they liked the cheetos, and Beck got his hands nice and orange and then turned around on my lap and put his hands all over my light blue shirt. Great. He also enjoyed dumping the shredded lettuce from my $17 airport turkey sandwich onto the floor all around me. And chucking the crackers and cookies the stewardess gave him. Oh, and trying to stick his hands in my cup of coke or dump it on my lap. Or throwing his sippy cup in the aisle next to the crushed cookies and crackers. Meanwhile, I had given Daphne a drawing book with a dry erase marker. Within 1 minute she had dropped the dry erase marker down the far side of her car seat near the window. Of course I couldn't reach it with Beck on my lap and all of our crap on the floor. So she freaked out, "My marker! My marker!!!" They guy in front of me kept turning around and giving me crusties.

The rest of the trip consisted of holding a squirming Beck on my lap or walking him up and down the aisles. He smiled at everyone, which might have made up for me bumping everyone's elbows 20 times as I passed. Then it was Daphne's turn to go up and down the aisles. At one point we had turbulence and the captain told everyone to be seated. Well, I had put Beck in Daphne's chair and he was nearly asleep, so I was just trying to hold Daphne on my lap. She had an absolute FIT, so I set her down for a minute so I could get some stuff out of the bag for her to play with. Well, the snotty flight attendant got on the loud speaker and said, "Just a reminder, ladies and gentlemen, the captain has turned on the seat belt sign, so all passengers must be seated. That includes small children who are roaming the aisles." What a jerk. I wasn't letting her roam the aisles! I was just getting something out of my bag and couldn't hold her on my lap at the same time.

The good news is that the last 20 minutes of the flight were great. Beck was sleepy and just sat there and Daphne played quietly on my lap. And finally the plane landed. I let everyone get out before me so I could gather the kids' things from the 5 foot radius around our seats, unhook the car seat, and get the stewardess to help me carry all the stuff. Several people actually commented to me as they passed me that my children had been very well behaved. Phew! And when I deplaned, the double stroller was there waiting for me. We made it! And by the time I got to the baggage carousel, both Jennie and our bags were waiting. NOW this is going to be an awesome trip, now that that horrible plane ride is behind me.

Hopefully I'll have some good pictures to add to my next few blogs. I wanted to get pictures of me and the kids on the plane, but that was the least of my worries at the time. So stay tuned for pictures of the cousins and Texas.

p.s. One more awesome thing to add: My stomach bug made me lose 2 more lbs!!!

Monday, March 3, 2008

Death Warmed Over

I dont' know what the term "Death Warmed Over" means, but I know what it feels like. This weekend our house got hit by the stomach flu. UGH. Big Daddy started throwing up Saturday night. I figured it was just something he ate because the rest of us felt fine. But by 4am I was having the worst diahrrea--the kind you have to run to the bathroom for or you won't make it. And every 15 minutes thereafter, sometimes less, I'd have to run to the bathroom. I began getting achy and having chills, and by morning I was sick as a dog. (And that's another thing; Where does THAT idiom come from? Why a "sick dog?" I've never seen a sick dog. All the dogs I've ever seen are robust and hyperactive. Is there some island in the world where all the dogs lay around with aches and fevers and throw up? Remind me never to go there.) I took Immodium, followed by another dose of Immodium 4 hours later, and things finally got under control about 11am. But I was feeling like....ya, here it is again, death warmed over. Every part of my body hurt. Even lying in bed hurt. I couldn't sleep--my brain wouldn't shut off. I had the Deigo theme song stuck in my head for about 20 hours straight. I was too weak to get up, my stomach was too crampy to eat. I can't remember the last time I felt that awful. I was hoping that the kids had been spared. But when Big Daddy went to get Daphne up, she had thrown up sometime durig the night. And Beck had the same kind of diarrhea as me. None of us had much of an appetite. And Beck kept lying down on the floor, he was so tired and weak.

The worst part about it is that I had a TON of stuff to do to prepare for my trip to Texas the next day. Laundry, packing, tying up loose ends, etc. And I got NONE of it done. By evening I wasn't feeling any better...maybe worse. But Big Daddy was on the mend, so it gave me hope that this was just a 24 hour bug and that I'd soon be better.

Well, its 7am the next day and I AM feeling better. I'm not 100%. I still feel a bit weak and shakey. But the aches seem to be gone and so far I don't feel any stomach cramps. But I also haven't tried to eat yet.

Well, I'd better get going. I have a full day of work ahead of me to get ready. Traveling by myself with the two kids was daunting enough; now I have to try to face it at 80% strength. And I just called the airline and found out that there are no extra seats on the plane for me to put Beck in, so I'm going to have to hold him, which will be such a joy. Wish me luck!