Do WHAT to my WHAT?!?

If you use gmail (and possibly if you use other email programs or even web browsers), you may have noticed that there are ads on the sidebar, and that the ads often relate to the subject matter of the email you're writing or reading. At least I have noticed this. If I send someone an email about the zoo, there will be zoo ads on the side bar. If I read an email from someone about Mexican resorts, there will be Mexican resort ads on the sidebar. Well, today while reading an email with some pictures of my Vegas trip from my friend who accompanied me, I saw an add on the sidebar about LABIAPLASTY!!! First of all, RANDOM. There was nothing in either her email or my reply even slightly related to anything remotely having to do with said-plasty. But more importantly, ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Women DO THAT??? AGH! Even after my recent trip to Brazil, where I discovered that the topography wasn't exactly how I had pictured it, I can't imagine being intimately acquainted enough with that area to decide I didn't like the way it looked. And even if I decided that I didn't like the way it looked (though why would I? What do I even have to compare it to??), I can't imagine giving the doc the scalpel and the go ahead to slice and dice down there. I'm thinking surely labiaplasty must be a joke. It's not real, right?

p.s. If it is real, don't tell me. I want to live in a fantasy world where hoohas are not up for that kind of make-over.

As If You Cared

I know picture posts are sometimes the dumbest ones of all.  BOOOORRRRRIIIIIINNNNGGG.  Especially vacation picture posts and kid picture posts.  It's like, "Hey, everyone acknowledge (or lie about) how cute my children are!"  And "Hey, aren't you all jealous of how fun my vacation looks?"  Something about it reeks of a desperate need for validation.  Or a serious lack of writing creativity.  Or, at the very least, a majorly boring life.  Personally, I go with option C.    So without further ado, here are my vacation pictures.  (My kid pics were right before this, in case you missed them).  

Dinner out.   Christie and I got together with our friend Jen.  The irony?  Jen lives in Salt Lake.  But when do we get together with her?  When she happens to be in Vegas the same weekend as us.  


This is my favorite picture of Christie. She has the same look on her face that my daughter gives me while saying, "What EVER."


Coldish, hurricane force winds hit Vegas the first two days we were there.  This is a picture of me freezing while simultaneously showing off our awesome view of our awesome pool.


More dinner out!  If you enlarge this picture, you'll see that two of these three people have demonic red eyes.  The other one has angelic blue eyes.  Who do you think came down to Vegas to get in trouble and party and who is going to heaven?  (Just kidding.  We didn't party at all.  We were very good and very boring.  Thanks for joining us for dinner on the Strip of Sin, Rychelle.)


Definitely one of the best parts of my trip.  I got my second ever pedicure.  Complete with massaging chair and irate Vietnamese woman.  EXCELLENT.

You can't go to Vegas without eating some seriously good desserts.  Or at least licking them.

You know I HAD to stop off at the Wynn and use my favorite bathroom ever.  Look at the height of those doors, people!

This is Christie in the car.

This is me and Christie in the car.



This is a picture of me taking a picture of Christie taking a picture of her odometer hitting 88,888.   Do we know how to get crazy or what?

There, that wasn't SO awful, was it? You may now commence with the obligatory "Looks like fun/wish I was there/nice pics!" comments.

Let It Rain

Look at these adorable rain galoshes I got off ebay....




And look who I found strutting around in them....



I'm saving that one for the wedding video.

Revenge of Mommy Funcakes

It seems that while the mouse is away, the cat will also play.

We passed like ships in the night, Mr.FunGuy and I. Twelve hours after his arrival from China, I was on my way to Sin City. And I guess someone takes his role as Chief Fun Parent very seriously. Because I returned home yesterday to this....


















Sugar cereal. Treats. And New Toys. The Trifecta. Oh I see where this is going. This is WAR!

Well, Mr. Funguy, I have 8 hours at home with the kids, the DVR, squirt guns, a secret stash of Easter candy, Pop Tarts, bubbles, and a buttload of chocolate chips.

BRING IT ON!!!

Home Again, Home Again, Jiggity Jig

I'm home from Lost Wages. And actually I didn't lose any wages. I didn't even play a single slot machine. In fact, for all intents and purposes, I could have been in any warm city in the country for all the use I got out of Vegas. And that's just how I wanted it. Lots of lounging by the pool, sleeping in, napping, eating out, and reading. NOT very much blogging or internetting, unfortunately, because I couldn't get a connection in our room. But I'll try to make up for it. (Is anyone even still reading my blog?)

As for the Las Vegas Strip, this is all I had to show that I'd been there.....



Oh, and this....




Whew, that's bettter. I think I'm going to work a pedicure into my "must do" Vegas routine from here on out. Even if the Vietnamese lady did say a few mean things about me that I couldn't understand while she ground off my calouses and scrubbed the motor oil out of my heels. Don't ask me how it got there. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.

Going The Extra Mile

I know I've ranted commented on the state of customer service these days at least once or twice before, but I got a new one today that I thought was noteworthy.

So first the background. I got an iPod Touch for my birthday. And after dropping it once or twice, I decided it would be wise to get some sort of skin for it, to protect it. Also, Big Daddy has an iPod Touch, so the skin would also serve to differentiate the two. When I searched on Amazon, I found a skin I liked, and it came with a screen protector and neck strap too. I thought the screen protector was a good idea. And the neck strap, well, I couldn't think of a specific use, but I thought perhaps it might come in handy. So I ordered the trio. It came in about a week. The skin was about as I'd expected. The screen protector was much too wily for me and I couldn't get it on without bubbles. But that was my bad. Then came the neck strap. I opened it up and then picked up my iPod to attach it. Hmmmm...where does it go? There was no place on the skin to attach it, and the skin wasn't tight enough anyway. That kind of pull would have detached the skin right away. And I couldn't find anywhere in the iPod itself to wrap the little cord around. I turned it over and over, but nothing presented itself. So I fired off this email to the company I bought it from (via Amazon) called bestpricecenter.com:

Hi, I received an iPod touch skin and neckstrap from you. However, I cannot figure out where or how to attach the neckstrap to the iPod. Can yougive me help with this? Thank you.

-Arianne Thompson

And here is the response I got back today...

Dear Customer,

Your I-pod should have some kind of hook on it. You can hook up the neckstrap on the hook.

Thanks,

customer service team

Bestpricecenter.com

So what you're telling me is, you have a whole TEAM of people in your customer service center, and yet none of you know if my iPod Touch has a hook. It should, but you're not really sure. And rather than investigate this product you sell and how, exactly, it works with the product you have sold it for, you just sent me off a notice saying that, if the hook exists, I should be able to hook the neck strap to it. THANKS. Thanks a TON! Wow, that was brilliant logic. I am so impressed, not only with the spectacular design of the product (which may or may not actually attach to my product), but also your amazing powers of deduction. And you have really impressed me with your interest in my problem and making things better. By the way, my name isn't "Customer." It's "Arianne Thompson" as I said in my letter to you. But then, actually addressing your email to me would have required you to look at the original email, and looking for things is, we both know, not your strength.

Well, never fear, I'll keep looking for that elusive hook on my iPod. And when I find it, rest assured, your neck strap will not be on it. It's already in my local landfill. Thanks for nothing.

Flower Girl

When people ask me what my favorite flower is, I have a hard time choosing just one. I love flowers. All kinds of flowers. My favorite to smell? Lilacs. My favorite to get in a bouquet? Gerbera daisies. My favorite to look at? Lilies. My favorite to pick? Peonies. But overall, I'd have to say the flowers that give me the most joy are spring flowers. When the first crocuses push up through the ground in late February, I heave a huge sigh of relief; spring is coming. And then my grape hyacinths and daffodil spears start peeking through. Next my hyacinths and tulips. And by the middle of April, most of it is in bloom. And I swear my body feels 20 pounds lighter and my heart is a hundred pounds lighter.

Here are a few of my favorites from my garden....

This frilly, double daffodil

My favorite tulip. It's so tall and elegant. I transplanted a bunch of these from a different part of my yard, but only this one comes up every year now. It has the prettiest shades of pink and salmon and orange.



Although their stringy leaves tend to take over the garden, the intense violet of these grape hyacinths really pops against the green. And they're among the first to come up, so they always make me happy.


These darling jonquils are white with pale pink centers instead of yellow. They're tiny and delicate and adorable. I love them.

This is a parrot tulip. The edges are all frilly and spiky. Short, but very interesting.

I call these my fried egg daffodils. The centers are so orange, just like egg yolks. They're also really frilly and ruffly and interesting to look at.

What about you? What are you favorite spring flowers?




.